change?

Looking back a year, I've changed so much.

First it was finishing my Jr year and moving on Camp Luz. Here I re-discovered my faith and God. Devotions everyday, fellowship, loving campers, deep conversations that stirred my theology, and learning how to be me. Everything was amazing, and I loved where I was in life.

Then I headed back from camp and began my senior year of school. That was rough, I've had senioritus since late august, and it has been getting worse and worse since late October. Yeah, honors English last semester taught me a nice work ethic and all that, but this semester is so worthless. I do not need any of the classes I am taking to graduate, if i would have know back at Christmas how much I was going to cringe this semester I probably would have graduated early. I do my best to focus on the tops, you know the amazing Musical, My Favorite Year, and track (the best decisions I've made all year). My view of life has changed I don't really care about much at all. It is not that I am losing faith or doubting God; in fact, he and I have been quite imitate for the past year, it is amazing.

Doc, a good friend of mine who keeps tabs on me just as I keep tabs on her, told me recently that I've changed a lot. It really didn't sink into me then, but now that I look back at who I used to be I guess I have. Wednesday on the way to swing dance lessons Schafer brought up the fact the he and Doc had been talking about me earlier that day and I guess I've changed enough that it is worrying them. My bad, sorry guys, I don't mean to worry you.

I've gone through a lot this school year, stuff doesn't get to me the way it did. I also have a kind of "bring it on" view of life.

This spring too many people around me have passed away, and I learned today that yet another car accident happened around here taking the life of another person I know, he graduated in '05. I quit going to my school's FCA meetings Thursday mornings because it was so spiritually dead and it seemed that nobody cared or wanted to change. Psych class is so frustrating; I really enjoy the stuff I'm learning; however, some things have happened which make it difficult for me to respect the teacher and being in his classroom for 90minutes a day is not a fun way to start out everyday.